Not too long ago, when you came out to someone as a lesbian, you would often receive the response, But you can’t be a lesbian! You don’t look like one! I am never quite sure how to respond to that remark, but I am always sure it was not a compliment. We all know that lesbians differ in appearance as much as any heterosexual woman. However, it can be fun to play with the stereotypes.
The Butch Lesbian.
This woman generally wears her hair very short, can be fairly box’ish in build and/or muscular. She would never be seen in make-up or dresses, but if the situation demands it, she looks quite uncomfortable — almost like a man-in-drag. Her stride is very masculine and purposeful. Overall, a butch woman has a very take-charge attitude and personality, and does not take any guff from anyone — other than her lover, but that is another issue entirely.
The Femme Lesbian.
This woman is most comfortable in the role of a wife. Femmes generally pair up with butch lesbians, though it is not unheard of to see femmes with femmes or androgynes types. Femme lesbians are usually very feminine, very comfortable in dresses, make-up and styled hair. Most femmes are mistaken for heterosexual women and often complain lesbians usually ignore them.
The Lipstick Lesbian.
This woman tends to wear make-up and dress in a very feminine manner. Some believe that the lipstick lesbian is experimenting sexuallyand will return to the safety of a heterosexual life.
The Political Lesbian.
This woman has rejected the patriarchal society and surrounds herself with womyn only. She tends to insist very strongly on womyn only spacemost everywhere she goes.
The Non-Lesbian Lesbian.
Most often found in colleges, this woman dates men and has physical relationships with her roommates or friends. When one of her roommates/friends falls in love with her, she will declare she is not a lesbian — she likes men! This one leaves broken hearts in her wake.
We cannot forget this guy. Generally, he is a man who has befriended many lesbians. He will declare himself readily and assumes he is quite original. This guy can be fun — if not taken too seriously.
So, can you find yourself in any of those descriptions? No? Well, maybe a little of each then — although hopefully you are not trapped in a male body! Hopefully you had fun with this little exercise… and do let me know if I missed your favorite stereotype.
Until next time…